I am a terrible example of modern marriage. My parents were both divorced – my mother 3 times. All but one of my siblings has divorced, one of them more than I can recall. And I’ve divorced as well. As a testimony to marriage – I suck. But if I could find a willing female who was foolish enough to consent to it, I could get married in all 50 states. I wouldn’t have to step inside a church – unless I wanted to – and I could get divorced and re-married as often as I wanted as well.  By exercising this “right” I appear to share the same view of  marriage with at least half of the citizens of this country – as the last statistical report I read was that about half of all marriages end in divorce.

But my friends who are gay and lesbian can’t participate in this experience. The civil laws say they can’t. (Here’s a little historical perspective, if it were still in the mid-60′s then my friends who are married to other races couldn’t marry either.  That includes the parents of our president-elect.) But it’s not the mid-60′s it’s nearly 2009. And it is inconceivable to me that there are so many of my fellow divorcees who are unwilling to face the fact that marriage, as it is practiced by the majority of people in this culture in this country in this century, is not about anything other than two people who wish to be together and join in a civil contract to formalize this fact of their lives.

I do believe churches and religions have a very wide berth to determine the requirements for their subscribers to ascent into their heaven.  And I do believe that churches and religions can make all manner of rules about behaviour and lifestyle – including who can marry whom – for the devotees of their policies.  While I also believe they have the right to try to advise us and recruit us to their way of thinking and living,  I don’t believe religions and their believers have the even the tiniest ‘right’ to impose their rules about such things on others. Heck, isn’t that what the Taliban was doing in Afghanistan?  Isn’t that degree of religious fervor the basis of belief that is fueling the Islamic terrorists we’ve been told we are at war against?  Sheese – even within the Christian religion there are vociferous disagreements on issues that are fundamental to their belief systems; just pick a topic and you’ll find about as many opinions and rules about it within the Christian religion (based upon biblical ‘truth’ as pronounced by their leadership) and espoused by the thousands of churches and segments.  And, I might add, they fight it out amongst themselves with very large helpings of righteous condemnation and hateful speech toward one another. Each group defying (and often defiling) the other group with firm belief they are right and the others are wrong.*

In this contextual scenario of modern American culture I am amazed there is even a debate amongst rational people of this country over the issue of civil marriages being available to all legal adults who determine they wish to marry.  It is wrong to prohibit it and it is wrong for religious zealots to claim “ownership” of the civil side of marriage – while they can own the minds of their believers all they want – they can’t tell me what to believe or how to practice it. And to think otherwise is against the fundamental precepts of our constitutional right to the separation of church and state.

That’s it. Plain and simple.

Here is a video featuring Keith Olbermann, who is certainly more eloquent than I.

If you’d like more information on the specifics of this topic as they relate to Proposition 8 in California and what you can do to support the effort to overturn it, please CLICK HERE

Oh – and if you think I’m wrong and you are right, would you want to share your thoughts? Please Please do. Here’s a fundamental question I’d ask for you to address:  “If religion can impose it’s value on all Americans – which religion and which interpretation of that religion is the chosen one?”

* Related posts
Fundamentalists scare the hell outta me
All Dogs Go To Heaven